Hollywood Film Coach

Bob Degus: 00:00

So in thirty years of watching more than 3,000 short films as an Oscar voter, I can tell you that there's one mistake that I've seen more often across more films, films with beautiful cinematography, films with excellent actors, films with great production design, great editing, and this same mistake shows up again and again and again. And it's something that no one talks about. And that's what we're going to get into in this episode, which is the number one mistake that I've seen filmmakers make across all sorts of genres, all sorts of short films. After forty years in Hollywood and watching more than 3,000 short films as an Oscar voter, I know what separates a good short film from one that wins awards. My name is Bob Degus.

Bob Degus: 01:03

This is the Hollywood Film Coach podcast where we'll help you create award winning short films. Episode three, the number one mistake that kills most short films. So let me give you an example of this without naming the film, but it's indicative of a number of different types of films. So you sit down, and remember, as a boater, you're sitting down, you're giving your time to watch this movie, and the movie has great cinematography. It has actors that you know and recognize.

Bob Degus: 01:38

It has, like I said, a great production design. It has a script that's somewhat well written, and you're watching the film. And remember, in filmmaking, there's a dialogue and discussion between the filmmakers or the director and the audience, and there's a communication that's happening back and forth. And what I've seen happen a lot is that no one has answered this fundamental question, What is this film about? And that's a really specific thing.

Bob Degus: 02:18

What is the film about? And then the parenthetical about that is what are you trying to communicate to your audience? Because if I can't figure that out, or if an audience can't figure that out, you've lost us. As voters, you've lost us as just people watching a movie. It's really critical that you know what your film is about.

Bob Degus: 02:41

Now, that's a very general and ambiguous statement. So in this episode, I want to break it down in detail so that you can understand what that exactly means, because I know I certainly had trouble when I first heard this concept of, Yeah, know what my film is about, and actually, I really didn't. So let's dive into that point by point and take it apart and really see what the issues are that go into knowing what your film is about. So let's unpack what really not knowing what your film is about means. So the first thing is confusing plot and premise.

Bob Degus: 03:28

And these two issues for me, I struggled with this for a long time, until I thought of a way to actually make it very clear and understandable for myself, and hopefully it will help you do the same as I explain this. So imagine a story about a woman who has returned to her childhood home after her mom has died to pack up her mother's things. So that's plot. The woman is returning to her mom's home. She's got to go to Home Depot and get boxes and tape, and she has to pack up the boxes and go through the things and carry them out of the house.

Bob Degus: 04:06

That's plot. Premise is this: that this woman, in the process of clearing out her mother's house after her death, is presented with the discovery of whether she has become her mother or not, and if that's a gift or if that's a curse. Now, the second thing becomes very interesting, because we all can immediately wonder and immediately know we all have complex relationships with our parents, and are we becoming them or are we not becoming them? That becomes a very interesting movie. And if you think about it from the perspective of making the film, if your focus is on the plot, okay, we have to go get the boxes, we have to move them out, she's putting them in a truck, those type of events, that's going to be a movie that doesn't connect with the audience in the same way that it becomes very clear right from the beginning that this is a story about whether or not this daughter has become her mother, and what she thinks about it.

Bob Degus: 05:21

And you can see right in that explanation that one of those things is very compelling, and the other one isn't. And so, yes, you need plot, and plot is very important to plot your movie through what needs to happen. But if you are thinking about your movie through the lens of premise, then every decision you make is going to be about revealing in that case whether or not this woman has become her mother, and whether or not she thinks that's a good thing or not a good thing. Now let me give you a couple examples from feature films that you may have seen that will hopefully make this even more clear. If you think about Everything Everywhere at Once, it was the Oscar winner a couple years ago, and that's a story about a Chinese American woman who discovers that she has the ability to travel through different dimensions.

Bob Degus: 06:18

Okay? That's the plot. What is the movie about? It's about a mother and a daughter learning to connect across generations. And why that movie was so successful is because it was the premise of the movie, which was this exploration of a mother and daughter trying to connect across generational differences, that made the movie universally appealing to audiences.

Bob Degus: 06:54

And that's knowing that, that director then made a whole bunch of different choices than if they didn't. Another example, which is always easy to think about, is The Wizard of Oz, which is a story about a girl who, you know, wishes that she could travel far away from home and go to magical places and escape her home life. Right? That's the plot. That's what happens.

Bob Degus: 07:23

A tornado comes. She gets transported to OZ. She meets a scarecrow. She meets a tin man. She meets a lion.

Bob Degus: 07:32

That's the plot. But what the story is about, the premise of The Wizard of Oz is that if you're ever searching for something, you don't search any further than what's inside you because that's where it's always been all along. And that's why the movie connects so well with audiences. So it's really important, especially in short films, that you understand the difference between plot and the difference between premise. So we're talking about what it is, what it means to not know what your film is about, and this is another really good example that I've seen over and over again that different filmmakers fall into the issue with, and that is serving too many ideas at once.

Bob Degus: 08:19

There are so many films that come in, and they're not about any one thing, and or they're about too many things. And again, if you're thinking about a feature film where you have an hour and a half or two hours, or Christopher Nolan, three hours, you have more time to develop multiple things. And in those longer films, right, the main theme that the film is about is then explored in subthemes, and there's the time for that. But in a short film, you really have the essential necessity to focus on one thing and focus on it really, really clearly, because, again, beautiful cinematography, know, acting, great editing, all of those things aren't going to serve a film where the director is trying to explore too many ideas and too many issues that just there isn't enough time to cover them thoroughly and deeply within the amount of time that you have. So the important thing is to really understand what it is that you're trying to tell, and arc your story in that amount of time.

Bob Degus: 09:42

So, if we draw from everything everywhere at once, the premise of that is about the relationship between a mother and daughter. And so, if that's what you're exploring in your short film, the relationship between a mother and a daughter across generational divides, then each scene and each choice needs to arc and explore that. You can't, in that story, also explore other side issues because you don't have the time for it. So you need to be super efficient and very clear that you're pursuing one thing. Because again, if you're pursuing a lot of things, then the film to the audience feels like you, the director, don't know what it's about, and I don't know what it is that I'm supposed to be following or understanding that you're trying to tell me.

Bob Degus: 10:38

Perhaps for me, one of the most heartbreaking examples of this is when it's clear that the filmmaker does know what the film is about, but they're not successful in showing it through their choices. I see this a lot of times on films, and it's hard to describe it, but if you go back and think about for a minute an early silent film when films are very simple, and so you have a chase where the villain has captured the woman and running off, the police are chasing him. And just as you're about to find out whether what happens between, you know, whether the woman gets rescued or not, the filmmaker cuts away to something else that doesn't have anything to do with that. And you're, Wait, how does that get resolved? And I see a lot of times filmmakers with really good scenes, but that the whole film doesn't work.

Bob Degus: 11:45

And so it's really, again, important that you're able to have the clear vision for yourself and make sure that not only do individual scenes work, but that the entire thing arcs from beginning to end. And these all work the same way, but the concept is really, do you, the filmmaker, know what you're trying to say, and do you know how to say it effectively to the audience? And these three points that I've just shared with you are really ways that I've seen in a lot of times where you're watching a film, and you, in my particular case as an Oscar judge, but also just as a filmmaker, it's I almost understand what you're getting at, or I understand what you're getting at it, but you're not succeeding at it. And so these three things are really important for you to think about, and let's explore how you can look if they're showing up in your work, and how you could maybe rethink what you're doing to make it more clear for your audience. So how do you know if your film has these problems?

Bob Degus: 12:55

And let me give you two tests that you can apply right away on the work you're doing and see what the feedback is and what you decide about it. The first one is a one sentence test. Can you describe what your film is about in one sentence? Not what happens, not what the plot is, but one sentence that captures the emotional journey of the film. And if you can't do that, then your film probably can't either.

Bob Degus: 13:28

So obviously, the time to do this is when you're working on the script, but if you're in the middle of shooting or editing your film, see if you can clearly answer that question, because from that point forward, you're going to start making different decisions. And the second test is the stranger test. See if you can explain what your film is about, what the premise is to a stranger. If they can't follow you, or don't understand what you're saying, then you need to do some work. If their eyes light up, and they're able to follow you, then you know you're on the right track.

Bob Degus: 14:06

And the simpler, or more simple, that you can say it with a short, concise sentence, the more successful probably your film is going to be, because it indicates to you that you're clear about what it is that the story you're trying to tell is about. For instance, going back to The Wizard of Oz again, it's a story about that if we're searching for something outside ourselves, really, we need to look no further than inside of us to find what it is that we're looking for. It's a very clear premise, and everything in that movie starts from that position. So if you discover you're struggling with this, what is the fix? How you solve this in your own work?

Bob Degus: 14:58

I've found in coaching and in my own work and in talking with other filmmakers, the real, the best way to do this is start at the ending of your film and figure out where you want your film to end. Because remember, we talked about how the ending of the film is really important. And so if you start looking at what the ending of the film is, it should be the concise statement of what you want to say. Again, let's use Wizard of Oz, because we brought it up. Dorothy gets back from her journey, from the Wizard of Oz, the nineteen thirty nine one, and what does she say?

Bob Degus: 15:36

She says, I'm not ever leaving home again because if I ever go looking for my heart's desire and it's not in my own backyard, I never really lost it anyway. So the ending of the movie is Dorothy's realization how much she values her home and her family and all the people around her. So from that point of view and that position, to make an effective journey in a movie, Dorothy, at the beginning of the film, has to start in the opposite place. And she does. She's trying to get as far away from home.

Bob Degus: 16:11

She's trying to get so far away she even wants to go over the rainbow to get away from her parents and life on the farm. And that gives you this clear journey that she can go on, because the version of the movie where she starts loving her family and having no play and not ever wanting to leave there and ending the movie in the same place, there's no conflict in that premise. So you want to give this arc of a journey, and so you can explore your work by really looking at your ending and making sure that the beginning is in the opposite place thematically. The second thing that also is helpful is see if you can get one word that describes the premise, to just help you feel it. Maybe it's forgiveness or longing or courage.

Bob Degus: 17:02

You're telling a story about courage, you're going to make different choices than if you're telling a story about forgiveness. So using individual words to help you, and then as you're looking on crafting this sentence of what your premise is, try to edit the fewer words you can say it in and have it accurately represent what you're trying to do, the more effective it's going to be. So if you have a very long explanation or cumbersome explanation of what your premise is, don't panic. Just start by pulling out unnecessary words from that until you can get to a really concise, simple explanation of what you want your film to tell the audience about, and then look at if the ending of the film communicates that, or if it doesn't communicate that. And that will give you a clear way to check and make sure that your film knows what it's about and is able to communicate that to the audience, because then you're going to use that lens for all the decisions that you will make in thinking about how to put your film together.

Bob Degus: 18:21

When I was outlining this episode, I was thinking about what short films I could use to showcase things that didn't work, and I felt it was kind of unfair to single out another filmmaker's work that wasn't effective when I had my own short film that actually made all of the mistakes in this episode. So let me share with you this story. So I'm early in my career, and I'm producing short films, and they're very successful. And I had an opportunity to direct my own short film. And so, I directed my own short film, and this one year, we submitted the short film I produced, and we submitted the short film I directed.

Bob Degus: 19:11

And it was a very difficult year for me because the short film I produced got nominated for an Oscar. It starred a very young Brad Pitt. And the short film that I directed did not get nominated, and not only did it not get nominated, it didn't even make a shortlist. And so, on one hand, I have this great victory of producing a short film that's nominated, and of course, the one I directed doesn't, and I took it very personally. And it would take me years to really understand why, what didn't work about the film I made.

Bob Degus: 19:49

And what didn't work about it were many of the things that we've been talking about in this episode. The simple plot of it was about a waitress who is on Valentine's Day deciding to break up with her boyfriend. And there's a series of vignettes where she's looking at her different customers, and she's seeing future versions of herself in future relationships. And it's a good short. I mean, it's certainly fine.

Bob Degus: 20:20

But the problem with it is it's trying to explore too many themes in too short a period of time. I was much more concerned with the plot of it. Okay, she's here, she's over with these people, she's there. I was much more concerned with the technique. Okay, now we're going to have this flashback where we're going to see this couple.

Bob Degus: 20:40

We're going to have this see this other flashback where this couple's fighting. But I didn't know what the premise of the movie was. And because I didn't know what the premise of the movie was, everything else I was doing didn't resonate with an audience. And so all of the technique and all of the lighting and all of that stuff, it's fine, but it doesn't grab you. The other film that was nominated for an Oscar with Brad Pitt, it was about two soldiers who came together, one Iraqi soldier and one American soldier, and they're both separate guys who have gotten lost from their unit, and they come together and they discover a dead soldier, and then they have to confront their own humanity to decide whether to bury him or not, and who's superior between these two soldiers, and what they're gonna do for this other dead man.

Bob Degus: 21:47

And the reason that film got nominated was because it it it had a premise, and it had a very clear through line about what it was about and what it was trying to say. And that's why the things I've outlined in this episode are so important for you to consider as a when you're making your short film, because it's really critical that you understand the difference between the plot and between the premise and what it is that you're trying to communicate with an audience. So what do these things mean for your film right now? Well, if you're writing and in development, ask yourself and write down in one sentence, what is your film about? What is the premise, not the plot?

Bob Degus: 22:34

What is the premise about? And if you can't answer that, stop writing until you can really refine that, so that then every scene you write after that is really in service to that premise. That's critically, critically important. If you've shot your film and you're in the editing phase, you're going to ask the same question with a little bit different twist on it. What is this scene doing to serve the premise of the movie?

Bob Degus: 23:04

And if you can't answer that question, then maybe consider removing that scene. Because again, you have this premise that you're trying to communicate with the audience, and so every scene that you're having in your film needs to communicate that. And that's especially important in a short film when you have a very finite amount of time with your audience. And then if you have your film finished and edited, and you're looking at it and exploring it with an audience, you really want to sit and feel when you're watching it with an audience, what is the audience taking from this movie? What are they feeling about it?

Bob Degus: 23:46

Not from the dialogue, but how are they reacting to it? How are they feeling about it. And then you're going to look for places where you feel their connection dip, or where you feel them getting restless in their seats. And you've all experienced that watching other people's movies. You're going along fine, and then you're kind of you get start moving in your seats.

Bob Degus: 24:07

And those are areas you're gonna look at wanting to tighten up in your film. So thank you for watching or listening to this episode of the Hollywood Film Coach Podcast. My name is Bob Degus, and I look forward to seeing you in our next episode where I'll be taking you inside the Oscar Screening Room, sharing with you what that experience is like in detail, so you can sort of reverse engineer it in how you think about approaching making your film, and thinking about it through the lens of an Oscar voter or a festival voter who is looking to program your work. One more thing. If today's episode sparked something for you, head over to hollywoodfilmcoach.substack.com for the companion piece.

Bob Degus: 25:01

It's original writing that goes deeper into the most important idea from today's episode and includes links to every film we've talked about so you can watch them yourself and form your own conclusions. The gap between a good short film and a great one that wins awards is smaller than you think. I'm Bob Degus. This is the Hollywood Film Coach Podcast. Be sure to subscribe, follow us and check out the next episode.

Bob Degus: 25:31

Please join me for episode four, What Oscar Voters Actually Look For.